Forever Yours
by perfectwolf
Summary: Sara goes through a life altering change with a broken heart. A/U
1. Chapter 1

Gil,

Even though I'd like nothing more than to see you again before I leave, I fear I no longer have the strength to do so. You don't know how many times I've thought about you over the year since I left. You haven't left my mind for a single day, and for the last year I've tried so many times to gather the courage to see you once more. I never could. I realize that it was me who left you. I often wonder if you hate me for it. I still wonder now. But, when I decided to leave, I left because I was carrying our child. I couldn't bear exposing the tiny life we created to the dangers I knew and lived through in Las Vegas. We already had gone through Natalie, and I couldn't put her through more. Turns out, leaving didn't help save our child anyways. I left to protect her, and she died soon after she was born. Now, it's my turn. I send you this letter so you can know that I have always loved you. I've loved you since the day we met. I always knew this would happen and my only regret is that I can't say good bye to you. I knew I was dying and I knew the odds were against me the longer I waited. But, truth be told, I never wanted to admit it. The doctors found a brain tumor right before the incident and I ignored what they said for as long as I could. But then, I had a reason to live. I didn't know what to do, so I ran. I ran to somewhere I felt would be safe. Safe to bear our child and a place I thought I could cheat death from, if only for a little while. I knew your position at the lab and understood you didn't have the option of leave with me. The lab needed you, and your job is your life. It was the same reason we never married. Even though I did the only thing I could think of at the time, I always regretted leaving you. I still do. You've been in my thoughts and dreams since the day I left. And now, I like to think we'll meet again. I beg you to forgive me and grant me one visit. A visit so that if I live, I can wake up to a friend, and if I don't I can die knowing you were there with me. The thought of seeing you again, even if just for a little while, warms my heart. Let me see your face one last time before I put my life in the hands of luck. And even if you can't or won't come, I understand. I love you. I always have. I always will.

Forever yours,

Sara

A/N So I've completely failed in actually planning a story, so as always I'm just going to wing it. Let me know what you think so far by clicking the green button below!!! And SON'T JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS!!! I plan to have a story that twists and turns like a rollercoaster.


	2. Chapter 2

Grissom walked through the halls of the Las Vegas Crime Lab headed towards his office like every other night. And like every other night, nobody approached him with questions or conversation. Over the last year people stopped coming to him, for every time they did he would shoot them down. Since Sara left, his attitude changed to angry and his unsocialness increased. As he passed the break room he could hear Greg and Nick talking in something above a whisper.

"…Sara…surgery…not…heard…" At the mention of Sara's name, Grissom stormed off in a tornado of emotions. All of them clashing together to make an unpleasant Grissom.

By the time the shift started, Grissom had gotten nowhere in the paperwork that he was supposed to finish. In fact, the large pile of papers in his inbox went untouched and the month's worth of papers still remained in a disorganized stack. He grabbed the assignments for the night and went to distribute them his co workers.

Upon his entrance he was bombarded with questions about things he really didn't know. They were questions that nobody's asked in a while.

"Are you going?" Catherine asked, assuming he knew what she was referring to.

"Going where?"

"To Sara. She went in yesterday."

"No, why would I go see her?" _She's the one who left. If she wanted to come back, she would have by now. _

"Because she told me she asked you to come." Nick said.

"Come where? I'm not going anywhere."

"I thought you loved her."

"I did."

"Then why the hell are you here? If you loved her you would have gone to her," Greg fired.

"I'm not going the hell anywhere. I don't care where the hell she is, she's not here. She can deal with everything herself. She left me, not the other way around." Grissom started to yell. He was getting mad at this whole thing.

"So that's it? You're not going all because she left you for a pretty damn good reason? If you loved her at all you would have forgiven her for this." Greg snapped and grabbed his assignment, turning and leaving with "bastard" whispered on his lips.

"No, I'm not forgiving her. There's no reason to." He clarified to the others, before leaving to his office again. He still had a mountain of papers to finish and Ecklie was nagging at him to get it done.

Grissom had just finished signing his name at the bottom of a form that he couldn't remember what was about when he looked at his inbox. He was at the bottom of the stack and only one thing remained. He was quite proud of himself, finishing all the papers in time for shift to end. It wasn't as bad as it could have been. Throwing the papers he just signed into his outbox, he grabbed the last thing in cursory, wanting to get home soon.

He took the small white envelope in his hands. The writing that addressed the envelope was familiar. It was her writing. Sara's. Sara, the woman that left him with no hint as to why. The woman who put him into a grave mood whenever her name was heard. The woman he never expected to hear from again. Slowly, he tore open the envelope, his hands shaking and his mind spinning.

Pulling out the letter, he wondered how long it had been there, sitting in a pile of papers. He unfolded the single paper and let his eyes fall on the handwriting that gleamed on the paper.

He read the letter, three times just to make sure it was real. The conversation in the break room finally made sense to him as he read her words. She needed him, and he wasn't there. And of all things, she still loves him. And he just screwed everything up.

A/N Short and a little messy, but like I said, I'm still not sure where this story is going to lead. All mistakes are mine, because I have no beta, and I wrote this late last night. Happy Holidays to everyone, and I just realized the review button is not longer green.


	3. Chapter 3

When I woke up, I was surprised. I was not experiencing the things I expected I would. I wasn't clueless as to where I was, I didn't feel numb, it didn't hurt to think, as far as I could tell, I was completely fine. I knew I was in the hospital, I knew I had a splitting headache and I knew why. In fact, I didn't start to worry or break down until I realized I was alone in the room. _Be reasonable_ I kept repeating to myself, _he probably just stepped out for a moment._ I checked the bathroom. Open. I checked the room for the 10th time. No sign. I looked at the doorway. Clear. And though there was absolutely no evidence that he was actually here, I had to keep telling myself he was. And that he was only stepping out and he would be back at any moment.

But he wasn't.

He wasn't there. I waited for two hours, driving off the waves of sleep that came close to taking over my body, just so I could see him again. But he didn't show up. In the two hours I remained awake, the only people I saw were doctors and nurses, checking up on me and writing stuff on the board next to the doorway.

_He's not here. He's not coming. _I finally accepted the truth as sleep took over me and my mind turned blank.

I woke to find something that wasn't there when I fell asleep. Or rather, someone. I didn't have to open my eyes to know. I could hear their breathing, and their foot tapping on the floor. I opened my eyes to a pair of blue eyes that I didn't expect to see.

"Grissom."

I couldn't believe it. He was here, in this room.

"You came."

"Yes, I'm sorry I wasn't here earlier…"

"It's fine. You're here now."

I would have forgiven him for murder. After a year, I was finally seeing him again. He had forgiven me for leaving, and he had come.

His phone rang with a loud ring that echoed, disrupting my thoughts. He went to answer it, and stepped outside the door. I turned over, giving him more privacy that just being a few yards away.

"Grissom."

"Yes, I know."

"She's my…friend…Sofia."

Friend. That's all I was now. I felt my heart sink in my chest. He didn't love me anymore. I was his friend.

"What can I do? I'm sorry, but this was important."

"Yes, this was more important than…you…so what?"

That's all I heard. All I wanted to hear. He came because I asked him. It's what friends do. I was no longer his lover. No, that was Sofia now. I should have known. She'd been after him for a while, and with me gone and out of the way…

I pretended to fall back asleep, not wanting to hear how his new life was. I was his friend, and nothing more. Hell, I wasn't even sure friend was what I was; he had struggled for a word to describe me after all. I let my breathing even out, and the only thing that gave me away were the tears that ran down my cheeks.

A/N Sorry for the lateness, holiday havoc and monday madness got the best of me.


	4. Chapter 4

I couldn't pretend I was asleep any longer. Especially since he was sitting next to me with his hand running through my hair. I wiped the tears from my face, getting rid of the evidence, and turned to show him I was awake. He didn't retreat his hand, flinch… nothing. Instead he spoke.

"Sara, I want you to come back home. Return to Vegas."

"No. You go back. I can't go back there."

_Not to just return and witness you and Sofia first hand._

"Think about it. Please." Was his only answer. I thought about it all right. I thought about it for a whole three seconds before I nixed the idea.

The silence grew again. It was like that for a long time. And like last time, it was he who broke the silence.

"I want to see her."

"Who?"

"Our daughter."

"She's…"

"I know. I want to see her before I leave."

"I'll take you. She's the last thing I have from Vegas."

"You have me."

"You're leaving." _And I don't have you anymore._

"Sara, I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Not coming to find you."

"You can't change the past. It's fine."

The conversation ended there. It didn't pick up again, and for the rest of the day, I lay there, eyes closed, pretending to sleep, and he sat next to me. It was weird. He was there, with me, after the year apart, and as many times as I imagined reuniting it was never like this. Then again, half the time, I imagined us meeting and then dying. But the fact that I made it through the surgery, cheated death, and he came to me at the same time dating Sofia struck me as…more of a nightmare than dying. Now what did I have? I have nothing anymore. I lost the man of my dreams, my daughter, and my heart. I was truly dead. And as it turns out, I am more dead now, than I would have been if I had actually died. Because if I had died, I would have died thinking that maybe he still loved me, and that I wasn't alone. Now I was alone, losing the lover who was…is…now my friend. The friend I could quite possibly lose also.

A/N Short lame chapter, I know, but I'm thinking about stopping this story because I feel like I'm rambling and getting no where and I'm not even sure what this story is supposed to lead to. Review, let me know...


	5. Chapter 5

I watched from afar. I watched him look at the grave of our daughter, the one he never got to see, hold, or call her name. Until now, he didn't even know her name. I saw him kneel over her and stare at what could have been his little girl. She was under a tree. A tree that stood tall and sturdy. One that protected her, and at the moment Grissom, from the falling rain. She was in the protection of the tree. Forever its. Rain covered the whole graveyard. Fitting. Rain came to see me on this gloomy day. The day that the last person I loved said goodbye. I had lost my daughter, I had lost my lover, and I had almost lost myself. I was truly a lost person.

The car ride was the long. I was trapped in a confined space with him, with only him to talk to. So it was a quiet car ride. It wasn't until I was exiting the car and going to my apartment that he said something.

"Sara, can we talk?" I could never say no. I led him to my apartment and sat him down on the couch. I sat on the opposite end of the couch and was facing him.

"Sara… Have you thought about Vegas?"

"Yes." No

"I leave tomorrow, and I was wondering if you have reconsidered."

I couldn't. I couldn't go back to the City of Sins. The place that reeked of death. The place that had everything I had ever wanted. The place that held what I lost.

"The team needs you Sara. It hasn't been the same. All they ever do is talk about you and they miss you Sara. Your friends…your family needs you."

I had to give it to Grissom. He was very good at putting up an argument.

"I'm sorry Grissom, but I can't go back there."

"Why Sara?" His blue eyes stared straight at mine for what could have been the first time since he came here.

"Because, I've lost more than I thought was possible. I can't go back to Vegas only to see what else I have lost. My heart can't take it."

He didn't like my answer. I could tell by the way his eye brows lowered and his mouth set firm in a straight line.

"I'm sorry Grissom."

I stood up, signaling that it was time for him to go. He got it.

"Sara?" He asked, stopping right before the door.

"Yah?"

"You still love me though, right?"

What did he want this bit of information for? Just to crush me more? He made no move to leave, so I turned walking away from him.

"Yes, I will forever be yours." I whispered over my shoulder. I knew he could read my lips, so I knew he got what I said. I left to my bedroom, closing the door. I will forever be his, but he was not forever mine. I heard the front door close, he left. He was gone. He walked away with my heart in his pocket, and left me here, stuck forever in the past. My heart gone with a man I was unlikely to ever see again. The only man I ever loved.

A/N thank you guys all for the encouraging reviews, and I will post the few chapters I have done, and if I can find out what it is that I want with this story I will continue. I'll try and post what I have soon, to make up for my infrequent posting.


	6. Chapter 6

The silence of the room only enhanced the memory of the past hour…s. The quiet offered me a chance to think, something that I didn't want to do. I didn't want to remember the phone call he had with Sofia, his new love. I didn't want to remember the look of pure love in his eyes when he saw her grave. I didn't want to remember how much I love him. And I didn't want to remember that he didn't love me. Life was moving on around me. People were changing, things were changing, and there I was. Forever stuck in the past. In a happier time in my life, the only happy time in my life.

My phone rang, disturbing my pity party. I didn't want to answer the phone, but when the damn caller keeps calling over and over, it's hard to ignore.

"What?" I demanded, my voice still quivering giving away I had been crying. God, I hated that.

"Sara? Are you okay?" Grissom?

No. I'm sure as hell not okay. Leave me alone. "Yeah."

"You sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure." What the hell do you want now?

"…Alright…I was just wondering if you wanted some company."

"No…" Yes. How many lies could I tell? "Not from you." I heard myself whisper. Shit, that was NOT supposed to be said. But hell, it was the only truthful thing I've said.

There was a silence. An eerie silence. Finally, I heard a voice…female? Calling his name saying that Doc had the autopsy results.

"You better go." I rushed and then hung up.

He was in a changed world. He had a new life without me. He didn't need me.

After all, who was I? I was broken. I was lost. I was dead. I was alone.

I sat there on my couch, returning to my pity party. Wishing things were as they once were. Wishing he still loved me. Wishing my daughter had lived. Wishing pain didn't hurt so much. And realizing that dying happy was better than living miserably. And understanding that dying under the knowledge of lies was better than living through the wounds of the truth. Because the truth never goes away. And this was all my fault. I should never have left. I should never have left the only home I ever had. The only home I ever will have.

A/N Sorry if this chaper is kind of...scrambled, this was the last chapter i wrote before debating quitting, but i'll try and not leave on this...depressing note. Please review.


	7. Chapter 7

My name is Sara Sidle. That's right, Sidle. It's been years since my surgery, and since my life ultimately turned upside down. It's been 3 years and 264 days since I last saw the man my heart belongs to. It's been 2 years since I met Scott. It's been 2 years and 3 months since I decided to try and move on. And it's been one hour since I last thought about Grissom. And even though I knew it was wrong, in exactly 8 hours, I would no longer be Sara Sidle. I would be Sara Johnson. Not Grissom. Johnson. My heart did not belong to Scott, but I did like him. I really did. And over and over, I kept telling myself that once I married him, I would love him. So here I am, standing in a white dress, waiting to be married. And in 8 hours, my life would take a new turn. And today, March 23, will forever hold meaning. The day I lost my heart, and the day I tried to find it again.

Grissom's office was quiet. It was quiet because for some damn reason, the team had decided to take a vacation on the same day. Of course, he said he would pull from swing and he'd be okay, but heel that was a lie. He knew that it would be a long night and he wasn't helping the pile of dead bodies by sitting in his office waiting.

The same day. Everyone on the same day. And this day of all days too. Grissom kept telling himself, trying to pick at why 4 people would all have things on the same day, and why it had to be today. Today. The day he made the biggest mistake of his life. The day he left the only woman he ever loved. Today, March 23.

He had left, thinking that Sara would eventually come back, when she had dealt with the loss of their daughter. But no, he was wrong. She never came. And when he arrived at the lab the next day, to come face to face with Sofia and had a yelling match with her about leaving her with Ecklie, he realized she overheard their phone conversation. The phone conversation that had conveniently sounded a lot like he was dating Sofia.

_"Grissom."_

"_You're not here and you left no notice what so ever that you were leaving. Ecklie's having a field day."_

_"Yes, I know."_

"_Look, could you come back soon? How long are you going to be...wherever you are?_

_"She's my…friend…Sofia."_

_I didn't know what to call Sara, was she still my girlfriend…lover?_

"_You're with a friend? Wait…is it Sara? Hell if it's her stay, Catherine told me all about how she was sick with something. But did you have to leave with short notice? Couldn't you have at least written a note so that Ecklie wouldn't be at our throats?_

_"What can I do? I'm sorry, but this was important."_

"_More important than work?..."_

_"Yes, this was more important than…" I interrupted but then was interrupted._

"_Wow, I didn't know there was such a thing for you. Well, we are talking about Sara… Well as long as you're there with her, stay as long as you want. But you owe me, who do you think covered your ass when you disappeared?"_

"_You..."_

"_That's right. So…"_

"_So what?" I asked, because she paused for a little, most likely writing something._

"_So…do you think you can do me a favor?" I walked away from the door, tired of standing still._

He hadn't realized what he had done until it was too late, and he never went back to fix the problem after that call. And it was too late to take back the memory. And the last glimmer of hope he clung to was her last words to him. The last word she said before he left and broke her heart. I will forever be yours.

A/N WOO, sorry this took so long, i just got back from vacation and had to catch up on homework and stuff. Hope you guys will forgive me.


	8. Chapter 8

I knew I couldn't hold on to the past forever. The past was only what my life once was. And I knew that I shouldn't be marrying Scott. Yes, he was an incredible man, one that if my heart wasn't stuck on…Grissom I would fall in love with. And no, I was not backing out of this wedding. It just felt…wrong. Like I was using Scott as a way to move on and prove to myself that I wasn't totally dependent on a man that I haven't seen, talked to, heard from, in years. I would love Scott. I just needed time.

This whole battle of my ethics was raging in my head, and here I was, standing in front of a mirror in a white dress getting ready to walk down the aisle in a matter of minutes. I had only invited 4 people, my old friends. I was wanted to invite Grissom, but it seemed so wrong, to invite the man I love to my wedding just to see me be taken away. So I didn't invite him, but now, seeing that I was alone in the room, I wasn't even sure they were going to show up.

"SARA!!!!"

I was wrong, they were here. My heart lightened to that fact. That I still had friends somewhere.

I turned to see who had yelled my name, expecting…only one person to have slipped away from the crowd to reassure me that they had come. Nope, all 4 of them came bursting into the room, arms wide for hugs and grins plastered on their faces.

"Hey guys." I greeted them all, being squished between all four of them.

"Holy cow Sara, you look beautiful." Greg informed me after they all decided that I was worthy of air and could be allowed to breathe again.

"Thanks Greggo, glad you all could come. What did you have to give up so that all of you can come here?"

"Nothing actually, Grissom said he would pull from swing." Catherine said. None of them knew why I never returned. I never told them the…details.

"Long time no see. Seriously, Sara, couldn't you at least have come down to visit?" Greg complained.

"No, I was…busy. Does Grissom know that you guys were coming here for me?"

"No…you mean you didn't tell him?" Catherine asked.

"No, I…"

"God, and I thought he was being an ass for not coming. We figured he didn't want to come so he stayed behind, not that we minded, seeing it allowed us to come. I mean I know you guys broke off, but it did seem kind of harsh not to support you." Nick said in I swear was one breath.

"Yah, no, I…didn't tell him."

"Anyways, so who's the lucky guy? You've told us all about him, and yet we never met him." Warrick, tactfully changed the subject.

"You'll see him soon enough."

"Yup. I'm sure we will, hey guys meet you outside. Go find us some seats." Catherine waved the three guys away.

"Bye, Sara." They all left. For some reason, I swear that this was preplanned.

The guys were gone, and I was alone with Catherine, who pretended to help me prepare for the big event. But if I know Catherine, which I do, there was something more she wanted from me.

A/N Haha thanks guys for forgiving me. Those of you who say they only will if this is truely a GSR story, don't fret, it will be. In the end. I have some plans.....kinda....


	9. Chapter 9

"Catherine?"

"Yah Sara?"

"You can ask me."

I knew I shocked her by the look on her face and the way she stopped everything she was doing.

"I…how did you know what I was going to ask?"

"I didn't. I just knew you had a question."

"Oh, well…I was just going to ask…uh…Sara, why exactly did you stay here?"

"Cath, I'd rather not go through this right now."

"I know, I'm sorry, it's just that, you seemed so happy with Gil and…I just can't piece together why you would choose to stay here and not…come home."

"I couldn't go back Catherine. I had lost everything in Vegas; going back was just shoving that fact in my face."

"Lost everything? How?" I heard Catherine barely whisper under her breath. It was more like a mouthing the words, but it didn't matter. I understood what she was saying. It just didn't make sense anymore. Wouldn't Catherine know that Grissom was with Sofia? Know that he left me? If she didn't know about our daughter, at least she would know about him. She worked with him. She had to know. She was Catherine, Gil's best friend and on top of that knows everything that ever happened in the lab. If two people got together, she knew it before it even reached the grapevine. So of all people, Catherine would know about Grissom and Sofia.

"I couldn't go back just to see things I couldn't have." I finished, not bothering to address my true question and the statement that rattled my brain. I was getting married, it didn't matter.

"Sara, there was nothing in Vegas you couldn't have. What are you talking about?" Catherine asked, utterly confused. Well, we were finally getting somewhere. At least we weren't beating around the bush anymore.

"I…Can we talk about this later Catherine?"

"Sara, we could, but we shouldn't. I think I know why you didn't invite Gil here."

How did she guess? Did he tell her? Was it that obvious? Can we just drop the topic so I can get married and be happy again? How did she know this again?

"I…how did you know?"

Oh yeah, she is a criminalist.

"I just knew. I put two and two together. I am a criminalist after all. It's what we do. It helps that you just admitted it too."

Shit. Damn it, now I was stuck.

"Catherine, I can't do this now. I…I just can't."

"It's fine Sara. But…"

Alright Cath, just leave me hanging. But what? Even though I didn't want this conversation to begin with, I pretty much needed to know what the 'but' was. Curse my curiosity.

"But???"

"But Grissom still loves you. He never stopped loving you."

A/N Aha, I feel so proud that I actually got this up. Now, I'm just sort of stuck in a hard place about what to do next... Oh well I'll figure SOMETHING out :P P.S. Please Review


	10. EXTRA

A/N Hey all, I'm still working on the next chapter, buffing out some details. So anyways I found this story a while back ago and typed up my version of it. It is a real tale, and it's probably one of my favorite. Anyways, I thought I would share it in case I don't finish the next chapter soon...in a few days. So you don't have to read it if you would rather stick to the story, but I thought this was kind of touching. So if you like this story, please review and let me know if I told it well.

* * *

Hachiko The Most Loyal dog in the World

An Akita in Tokyo, Hachiko is famous for bringing the term loyal to his breed. In 1924, Hachiko was brought to Japan by his owner, a professor at the University of Tokyo. Every day, the man and his dog would walk to the train station. Hachiko would see the man off before returning home, and then come back again to pick him up and walk home together. This was the pair's cycle.

One day, the two set off like any regular day. Hachiko saw his master off and returned for him that evening. But, the dog's master didn't come. Unknown to Hachiko, his master had died that day. This did not stop Hachiko. He went and waited for his master at the train station the next day. And for the next 10 years, Hachiko would make the journey from his home to the train station every day. And for 10 years the dog waited for his best friend, and owner of a year.

It wasn't until one of the professor's students noticed his dog at the train station every day that it brought attention to the media. The people found Hachiko as the perfect example of loyalty and made a statue of him in front of the train station. Hachiko was there for its unveiling, before he died a year later.

In 1935, Hachiko died at the same spot where he last saw his master alive. He died waiting for him to return. And after 10 long years, the loyal dog finally joined his master. And to this day, his statue continues his vigil at the train station, forever waiting.


	11. Chapter 10

No. No. Not now. Why now? I was going to be happy. I was moving on. And now, he comes back to haunt me? No.

"Sara, I…I think you made a wrong assumption about Gil, he uh…"

"You know what they say about assuming. Assuming makes an ass out of you and me."

"Sara, did you think he was with another woman?"

"Yeah, I overheard him on the phone after my surgery."

"He never was. I promise."

Shit. My life was in shambles now, if it wasn't before. I almost laughed at the whole thing. The fact that my life could be made into a soap opera and a pretty good one too. Think about it, a woman (me) leave the man of my dreams, have his child, his child dies, undergoes a risky surgery, gets him back, thinks she lose him, really lose him, move on, finds another man, gets engaged, and then on their wedding day finds out that what she thought was entirely wrong and that the man she never truly got over actually loves her. How it ends, though is a mystery.

"Sara, I'm sorry, I know this is the worst timing."

"You're right, it is."

"So…what're you going to do?"

"There's only one thing I can do. I know what it feels like to have your heart ripped out. I can't do that to Scott. I may not love him like I do Grissom, but I still like him. In plus, it's probably too late."

"It's never too late, Sara."

It was. Not for things to change, but to fix the past.

* * *

It was a slow night. So slow, that he could call in sick, and nobody would give a damn. So he did. He told Ecklie, only because he didn't want him to bitch at him later, and left. It had been a quiet day, and although Grissom hadn't mentioned it, he missed the team. But somehow, in some way all of them decided to take a vacation on the same day.

Aw shit, some investigator I am. They were probably all at the same place. Oh well, wasn't like he went out with them anymore.

He headed down to Greg's. He promised the youngest member of his team to feed the dog he found while on a case.

After being mauled by a dog wanting attention, and scavenging the house for the food, Grissom took sight of a picture on the counter. It had a woman he was all too familiar with and a man he hadn't the slightest clue as to who he was. It was a wedding invitation. For today. He turned to leave the house, his heart aching from the inside. He had truly lost. She was marrying another man. She was not forever his.

A/N Sorry, it took so long, school's ending and I have to study for finals. :P


	12. Chapter 11

The aisle looked longer than it was. In reality, it was pretty short, seeing we were in a small church and the pews were overflowing. The small church was close by to most the guests, and where Scott had grown up going to. If it made him happy. After all, this day was to make him entirely happy, cause it sure wasn't making my day. Not to be selfish, but I had thought I had lost everything and in one day, the day conveniently being my wedding day, I had found out my life turned upside down from lack of communication. Fun. My brain continued to scatter through frantic thoughts of none other than Grissom as I continued to walk down the aisle. I looked at the guests, trying to find my party in the crowd of happy faces. I didn't see them until I was across from Scott, looking into the crowd. Yes, Greg would find front row seats.

I stared at them, more specifically; I stared at Catherine, the only one who knew the truth. When the man marrying us started reciting, I couldn't look anywhere but the floor. I couldn't look up without my face giving away my despair, and I sure as hell couldn't look into the love filled eyes without tearing up. I didn't want to get married anymore. I wanted to have Grissom back. Because no matter what the hell happened in my life, married or not, I would forever be his. And I haven't loved another man since him. He was the one, and the only. But yes, Scott was nice. I just didn't love him.

As the ceremony came closer and closer to the "I do's" I started imagining possible miracles. I could say I don't, but he had spent so much time and money to make me happy that it would just break his heart. An angry mob can come and torch the place, but that would only delay the situation. A gang could come and shoot him, but then I realized that they would probably shoot me too. In plus it wasn't right to hope someone would die. Nope my fantasy miracles never would…could happen. I was stuck.

"Is there any reason these two should not be wed?"

This was it! Maybe something would come up. My soon to be mother in law decided she spontaneously hated me. I looked at Catherine, praying to a God I never believed in that she could somehow help me. Save me in this last moment. I desperately wanted to yell, "ME! I HAVE A REASON!" but I couldn't. I just hoped someone could though. I hoped with all the heart I had left in me.

A/N I am done with finals! It always surprised me at how long finals can drag. Weeks just to take a few tests.. So much worrying. Its alright, because now that my panic has gone, I finally have more time to write! Sorry this was weeks delayed. Truely i am. REVIEW PLEASE!


	13. Chapter 12

For the first time I looked up at Scott. The odd thing is that he had his eyes closed. Not like a blinking soft closed, but like he was hiding from something and hoping it wouldn't find him. With that, I closed my eyes to, doing the exact same thing. It was if we were two of the same, hoping or not hoping something would say something. It's crazy, because the only real reason this was part of every wedding was for tradition.

"Me."

WHAT?

"Me, I have a reason." The voice spoke louder. I swear it was Catherine. It was coming from around the right spot, but Catherine.

"Ali?" Scott whispered, just to the point where I could hear him. "What the hell is she doing here?"

He knew her? Well, I guess that made sense, seeing I only had a handful of guests.

"Yes, I do have a reason that you two should not get married, because you're a cheating bastard."

She was right, all the nice men I ever met were. But then again Gil was a bastard at first…but after he finally took his head out of his ass as Brass would say, he was pretty nice.

"Ali, what are you doing here?"

Well that's a good way to draw attention to you Scott.

"You told me that you loved me. But obviously getting married to someone else tells me otherwise. What, were you going to continue fucking me while you were married? I came to ward off your other girl."

Her lips continued moving even though no sound came out. "And for some revenge." Reading lips did have its benefits. Grissom taught me before we…shit this was my chance; I had to use it now.

"You were cheating on me?" Fake the anger, come on Sara, you have to make this look good.

"No…I…I…Let me explain…"

"What do you mean 'No'? You obviously know the girl. And unless I'm mistaken you were sleeping with her, you don't call that cheating?" I wonder if I can fake some tears…

"Okay, yes but…"

"I'm done. Bye…Scott." And with that I turned and left the church, walking briskly down the aisle I had come through. My party of four followed behind me, all four of them walking as fast as me, catching up and if the aisle would have been long enough, they would have stood next to me.

Once I was clear of the church, and safely next to the car, I was surrounded by them all. And like always they all spoke at once."

"Most eventful wedding EVER!" Greg sounded excited. I smiled.

"Sara, I'm sorry about your guy." Nick sounded sincerely sad for me.

"It's alright Sar, I didn't like him anyways." Warrick said.

"Guys, its fine…I'll explain. Uh…do you guys have rooms at a hotel we could go to?"

"Yah, we're at a Marriot."

"Fancy."

"Come on, I'll ride with you Sara." Catherine said, dragging me to the car and hopping in the driver's seat. "I'll drive."

A/N Alrighty, we're getting somewhere! Hey, so my traffic thing is broken so leave alot of reviews so I know some people are reading this. Thanks


	14. Chapter 13

The car ride was silent. I was exceptionally thankful that Catherine was giving me a moment to think about…well stuff. Sadly, the moment didn't last too long, seeing that the ride from the church to the hotel was only about a mile and a half. The guys beat us to the hotel, and were already piled in Catherine's room by the time we got up.

"Hey, guys, how did you…"

"Get in here?" Greg answered. "Cath's room connects to ours, and seeing hers isn't occupied by three people, and you two were the last here, her room was volunteered for this fine meeting."

"Great," Catherine muttered, obviously regretting that her room had a connecting door.

"So Sara, I think there's a story that we all are anxious to hear." Warrick said, changing the topic quite smoothly.

"Yeah, there is…" There was a lengthy pause, as I sat on a chair. "Might as well get comfortable."

"You guys know that I was sick and had a surgery, and you guys know that I left. But…I didn't leave Gil or you guys, I left Vegas, and it was the biggest mistake of my life."

It was a way to start a monologue, I'm not too sure how detailed I really wanted to go. But after spending years of my life screwing up the present, the least I could do was put away the past, and move on.

"I left because I barely survived the kidnapping, and at the time, I was…pregnant."

Of course, there were the dropped jaws in surprise, and the shocked faces. And I could have sworn the question would come up, but it didn't. They remained silent, and let me finish my story.

"I…couldn't risk harming my child again, so I left, thinking that the dangers would stay in Vegas while I ran. But, it didn't save her. I couldn't save her. She died the day she was born, and after that, I went under the knife. Grissom came, though barely, and like a fool, I let him leave. The next 2 years, I spent trying to forget the past. Then, 2 years ago, I met Scott, and you know what's happened up to there."

It was abbreviated. Of course, I left out the details as to why I let him leave and so forth, but it worked.

"Sara…" Nick tried to say something, but was at a loss for words.

"Thanks for coming guys. It means a lot to me. I just hope you didn't mind the waste of a day."

"It was no waste, do you know how long it's been since we've seen you?" Greg asked rhetorically.

"Approximately 4 years…"

"Too long." He said matter of fact like.

"So…what's your plan now?" Nick finally found his words.

"Well, seeing I don't have a place because I was living with Scott. And the only thing I really had here was clothes, I was planning on going back…to Vegas."

All four of them did a little cheer, before making plans.

"I'll go with you to Scott's so you can grab some stuff." Catherine offered, while the boys offered to make flight arrangements.

Funny, because in the hours it took to do all these things, nobody bothered to tell Grissom. Guess nobody thought about it.

A/N I know this was probably a boring chapter, but i used it to REVIEW all that's happened:P did you like my clue? haha i didn't notice it was there until i reread it :P  
In case you didn't get the message, please review


	15. Chapter 14

A/N First part is third person, but the second part is Sara's POV

* * *

It was the beginning of shift, and yet his team still hadn't arrived. Grissom started to become impatient, for Ecklie would have his ass if they didn't show up. And of course, seeing they all mysteriously disappeared on the same day, and turned out to be going the same place, they should all arrive together. And as Grissom expected, they all wore grins on the face and tried to stifle what seemed to be laughter.

"Great, now that you're all here, we can get to work." His mood matched his voice, grumpy.

"What's got you all worked up?" Catherine asked as the others left.

"Nothing, Ecklie's just been an ass because I pulled half the swing shift to cover you guys."

"Hey, I know what'll brighten your day. Wait here; the guys brought you a surprise."

Before Grissom could tell him he didn't want no damn T-shirt with some touristy writing on it, Catherine had disappeared down the hall and after the guys.

A few wasted minutes and a much more pissed off Grissom later, all four of them arrived back and led him to his office.

_This had better be worth it._ Grissom kept thinking. After all, he had better ways to spend his time, like grieving about his loss of Sara. Well, he didn't lose her physically, he had emotionally. She had left, and put him…them in her past.

"Grissom, we brought you a little something back." Catherine said, from the other side of the open door. The four of them moved out of the doorway and left, leaving someone to take their place. A woman Grissom didn't expect to see again. Sara. His Sara. The woman he loved. The woman he lost. The woman who was causing all his pain.

* * *

I walked toward the man who looked very shocked to see me. I had planned to reunite a little more…smoothly. Maybe after I unpacked, showered and got some sleep. Something to eat wouldn't have harmed anything either. But of course, seeing as I had no car, was stuck at the lab because the guys were all late for shift, and Grissom was in a bad mood, I came to see him.

"Hi…"

"Sara…is it…"

"Yes, it's me. I…" I was still standing by the door, leaning against the frame, just like old times. Sadly all the memories with me at the door ended badly. Like the time I asked him to dinner or, in a completely not sex related manner, to bed. I guess it's just an old habit.

"Why Sara?"

"I…"

"Why have you come back? I…I can't do this."

"Grissom," Gil might be pushing it…

"Go away Sara. Leave me alone…I…I can't do this." Grissom said, the sadness in his eye clear.

If I wouldn't have been so tired, hungry, and grimy I probably would have argued a little more and tried to tell him what happened. But seeing as I was tired, hungry, and grimy, I was in absolutely no mood to argue, and if he wanted me gone I was gone. Screw him. And as I was walking down the hall fuming, I realized that if I wasn't so tired, hungry, and grimy, I probably wouldn't be so pissed off at him for wanting me to leave, and been more understanding that this is mostly all my fault. However, seeing that I couldn't fix the fact that I was hungry or grimy, I went to fix the one thing I could and went to take a nap in the car. This was just another memory to add to my list. Another bad memory by the door.

A/N The stories not over yet! I'm just short a few ideas... Anyways, don't forget to REVIEW and make my day...night.


	16. Chapter 15

"So…how'd it go?" Nick asked, while he drove as slow as possible on the freeway.

"It didn't."

"Sara, I'm sure he was just…"

"Just what? Having a bad day? Well so am I."

Yes, I was still in a bad mood. As tired as I was, I couldn't fall asleep. It was hot as hell in the car, and though I tried to pretend it didn't affect me, his words haunted me. They wouldn't leave, and like a broken record, played over and over again. "Go away Sara. Leave me alone."

"Sara, you probably just caught him by surprise. It's been a long day, why don't you take a shower while I order pizza."

A shower sounded nice…and well, so did pizza. "Sure. Just make sure there's"

"I know, I know, extra meat."

I laughed. "Hell no."

"I know, you like your rabbit food."

"Hey, Nick?"

"Yah?"

"Thanks."

"For what? I'm not doing much."

"For letting me stay for you. It means a lot." It did. He was giving me a place to stay when I had none. He was being the family I never had.

"Aw, it's no biggie."

"Thanks anyway."

* * *

Catherine marched down the hall with a presence that screamed 'move or be killed'.

"Hey, hey, what's this I hear about shoving Hodges?" Brass said, coming out of…well…nowhere.

"No time Brass, I've gotta…"

"Go see Grissom. He's hiding in his office. So what's this I hear about Sara? No one told me she was back."

"Yah, she came back, it's a long story."

"Ah, she get cold feet?"

"No, hey look, I've got to find Grissom. Don't mention Sara around here, there's enough gossip going around. She's at Nick's if you want to talk to her." Catherine said in a quieter tone while walking incredibly fast.

"Sure…"

The rest of his sentence went unheard as Catherine turned the corner, leaving a confused Brass behind.

"GRISSOM!" Catherine banged on the door as loud as she could.

When no one answered she banged and called louder. "GRISSOM, OPEN THE DAMN DOOR."

The door flew open suddenly, and Catherine's knocking fist almost came in contact with the graveyard supervisor that now stood in the place of the door.

"What the hell Catherine?"

"Don't what the hell me Gil, what the hell did you do?" Catherine countered, closing the door and the spectators out.

"I don't have a clue as to what you're talking about."

"Sara, that's what I'm talking about."

"What about her?" It wasn't really a question, but that really didn't stop Catherine from yelling at Grissom.

"She's back Grissom, and you'd think you would be happy. The woman that you've been sulking about for the past few years finally comes back and you tell her to get the hell out?"

"I don't believe I told her to 'get the hell out'." Grissom retorted.

"You might as well have."

"Wait, how do you know what happened?"

"Did you think I would leave? I was down the hall, waiting."

"Waiting for what?"

"I don't know good news?"

"Did anyone else hear this?"

"I don't think so…don't change the topic."

"Catherine, this woman basically told me she didn't want me anymore."

"That woman is Sara, the only woman you ever loved. The only woman you still love."

"Catherine, love is a two way street."

"It still is you dumbass."

A/N Wow, the summer monopolizes my time more than school did. I'm impressed. DOn't forget to review, I'm trying to his 100 reviews before chapter 17.


	17. Chapter 16

I was in the bachelor pad that Nick owned, lying on the only couch and staring at the ceiling. I hadn't moved for a good few hours. Nick was still asleep, and though he was as beat as I was, lovely insomnia only let me sleep for a few hours. So now, I spent the quiet in a useful way, thinking, about the only person who I ever took the time to think about.

It was an honest question, I argued with myself. I've been gone for what? 4 years. It was an honest question, wondering why I was back. It's not like we wrote, talked, or had any contact whatsoever with each other. He had every right to be angry; he hadn't heard from me in years and now all the sudden I'm back in front of him.

It was surprise. He was just surprised. And after my hours of pondering over my surprised theory, I finally convinced myself that he had only asked that question because he was indeed surprised to see me.

But, try as I might, I couldn't find an excuse for his other statement. His "go away" and "leave me alone" that still rang in my ears.

I gave up on the more hurting statement and circled back around to where I had initially started. "Why have you come back?" Why was I here? I was here to fix my mistake. I was here to mend 4 years worth of confusion. I was here because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't love anyone other than Gil. I still loved him. That's why I was here.

I'll give it another go. Since I was now in a happier state of mind, and no longer the crabby witch I was yesterday, I would try and persuade him to forgive me.

There was no use coming all the way out here for nothing. In plus, it's not like I had a home to go back to anyways. I lost it already, so there was nothing much to lose. Just because the past can't be changed, doesn't mean I had to let it haunt my future. I was going to fix the wrong I'd done. And in the end, even if he can't forgive me, I'll know that at least he doesn't hate me. That was something I could live with.

A/N Incredibly short chapter, I know, but it's all set up for what I plan next. PLEAASE don't forget to review, because I want to hit the big 100 for reviews! In plus, to make up for the short chapter, I will write a longish one next. And the rollercoaster is not over.


	18. Chapter 17

"Morning sunshine." Nick greeted me, fully dressed and showered.

"Morning. Hey what's for brea…"

"Lunch? It's not morning remember? We're meeting at the diner. Brass found out you were here and demanded to see you, so…"

Word spread fast I guess. Then again, it's not like I hid my presence yesterday.

"We meet in about an hour, so you wanna take a shower or…"

"Shower." I said with great pleasure and took off to his guest bathroom.

One long, hot shower and a change of clothes later, we were in the car headed off to the cheapest diner, and though their food wasn't the best, we ate there anyways. And of course being the first one's there, we got the pleasure of A-not paying, and B-Getting dibs on the seats. We sat at the booth with the view of the parking lot, giving me enough time to run if Brass decided he was mad at me about the wedding that I'm sure he knew about now.

Turns out, Brass was the next to arrive, and after giving me a hug, I got a slug in the arm while returning to my seat. Nick laughed. I faked injury.

"What was that for?" I asked, while he sat next to me. I figured I'd play dumb for some fun. I knew he wouldn't buy it.

"Leaving."

"Oh, I thought it was for…"

Aw shit, me and my mouth.

"For what?"

"What? You mean…" Nick started, caught by the same surprise I was in. Luckily, I was a little farther ahead of him in the shock, and was able to shut him up with a death glare.

"Mean what? Sara…"

"It's nothing." I tried to cover up my tracks.

"Sara, I know you're lying."

Damn his experience with liars.

"It's a long story."

"I have time."

Stupid response. Doesn't he know, that when someone says it's a long story, then it usually means drop the subject?

"Sara, I won't tell anyone."

"I know."

"Good, now spill."

With the best pout I could muster, I began to grumble. "Ithoughtboutwedding."

"What?"

"I thought it was about the wedding." I said, a little happier when I saw the shocked expression on his face. Nick laughed with me.

"This…is the…first time…I've seen…him…look…shocked." Nick was in hysterics. And he was right, this was the first time I've seen Brass shocked too. And of course, his shocked face went away right then and the others walked in.

"Hey, what's all the laughing for?" Warrick asked, sliding next to Nick.

"Yah, what did we miss?" Greg took his place next to Warrick.

"Catherine, taking the only spot left, next to Brass put in her comment. "By the way Brass looks, it's something to do with him, spill."

"Sara shocked Brass. His mouth actually dropped." Nick said, going back to laughing.

"Holy crap, what did you do?" Greg was eager to know.

"Told him I had a wedding."

"Oh." The table turned silent.

"Does he…" Catherine began.

"No, he just knows I had a wedding."

"And that I wasn't invited. How the hell do they know and I don't?"

"They were there."

"And you didn't invite me?" He feigned hurt.

"Sorry, but it was short notice. And you're too close to Grissom."

"So this is about him…"

""No, this is about how wrong it is to invite your ex to your wedding."

"SO where's the happy groom?"

"Look, all you need to know is that he turned out to be a bastard and that we never finished the wedding."

"Oh." Brass was at a loss for words. And for once, the waiter came at a good time, effectively ending that subject.

Food was ordered, food was eaten, conversation filled the time in between, but I couldn't wait until it ended. It wasn't that I didn't enjoy all of their company, but I was…more than eager to go to the lab.

There I was. All my eagerness to be here had vanished. It's funny. When you want something more than anything, you wish time would just speed up to the moment. But, when you finally reach the moment, it's like you want to go back to wishing you were here. And that was me. The what if's played in my mind, taunting me. I was about a second from running. Running away, like I'd done so many times before.

Maybe running was all I was good for.

I turned to leave the cursed doorway, when Gil looked up from the crossword puzzle he had been so engrossed in.

"Sara…"

"Grissom."

I walked in and sat smack damn in front of him. We were finally alone. Door closed in all, I was ready.

"Sara." Grissom repeated.

"Grissom, I…"

"Where's your husband?"

Yes, Grissom knew about the wedding. And yes, Catherine told him how it ended. But it didn't stop the pain. And without thinking, he said it. It wasn't that he hated her, more like he was wounded. A hurt bear lashes out in pain blindly, unconsciously hurting those around them. And if the one who wounded it was there, naturally it will lash out at them. Trying to even the pain. And as soon as Grissom said the three words, he immediately regretted it.

"It's a long story. And I hope you have time, because whether you like it or not, I'm here. And whether you care or not, I'm here to fix the past." Sara said, eyes not betraying her emotions. Her voice was strictly professional, with no hint of emotion.

"The past is the past."

"I can't change the past. But I can try and fix the present. Look, the last few years have been a mistake."

"Mistake?"

And once again, and hopefully for the last time, Sara launched into the story of her life for the last few years.

"Look, Grissom, I'm sorry. This whole thing should never have happened. Forgive me?"

"I do. So…?"

"Shifts starting, you should probably go." Sara got up suddenly. Ecklie was prowling in the background, and tired of all the attention, she figured she should disappear before he got here.

"I've done what I've meant to do for a long time. I've made amends. Thank you." With a quick departure, she was gone as quickly as she came.

"Sara…" Grissom was still staring after the woman. Looking at his watch, he had to go. But not before he could replay her last words. "I've made amends." He calculated her posture. Stiff and uncomfortable. Her voice. Emotionless and lacking warmth. Her exit. Quick and efficient. And her eyes. Separated and Distant. She's not in love with me anymore. She wants to be friends again, which is why she came to say sorry. But she didn't show any signs of wanting him anymore. She doesn't want me anymore. It was his sad conclusion. His last hope had been crushed. And he went back to anger. He crushed him yet again, coming here, giving him a glimmer of hope, and then tearing it to pieces. And lack any wounded animal; his natural instincts were to lash out. To those near him physically, those near him emotionally, and most of all, to the one who caused the pain.

A/N AS I promised, longer chapter. Okay, so I know you guys may be craving some fluff, but it's coming up. I'm trying to work the stroy into a touching moment. So in the next few chapters, I'm going to set it up. Review, and as soon as I get something good, I'll post it. P.S. Don't forget to review please.


	19. Chapter 18

Grissom…Gil had forgiven me. It was all I hoped for. One goal at a time. I reached one, so now I needed a new one. I want him to love me again. It would make my world whole again. Step by step, I would do it. I would reverse the damage I had caused.

* * *

_Friends. She wants to be friends._ Grissom repeated to himself over and over again. He wanted to be angry. He wanted to be furious that she was back and showed no signs of wanting him. He wanted to shout to the sky. Yell "Why did you bring her back if you're keeping her at arm's length?" But he knew no one would be listening. He knew that he couldn't change fate. And after his anger wore off, he went back to his hole, and pulled the rock over. He threw himself back to seclusion, becoming an empty shell. The world around him was like a dream. As if nothing actually happened and nothing really mattered.

Days blurred together. If someone how he was, he answered fine. If someone asked him a question, he answered with the shortest answer. No emotion showed on the outside. But that was only because inside him, emotions battled. Love was being crushed by hurt. And logic was being ruined by bias. His mind showed him everything he needed to see so that the losing side that he wanted to win couldn't. And though it makes no sense, all he knew was that he was confused.

* * *

"Grissom," I was back in the doorway. "You want to catch dinner?"

"Sure." There was no glimmer in his eyes. No life. No emotion.

"Grissom, I've been wanting to tell you something." I was tired of this. Days…Weeks have past. We've had dinner numerous times, and not a single time have we actually talked. I wanted to tell him so badly that I loved him. That I'm sorry. But every time I try and say something, I either chicken out or he leaves. As if he already knows what it is that I want to say, and he doesn't want to hear it.

"Sara, I'm sorry, but I'm late for a meeting with Ecklie."

"Since when have you ever been eager to meet with Ecklie? This will only take a minute."

"I'm sorry, I'm late. Dinner at the diner. I'll meet you there."

"Grissom, please, hear me out."

"Sara, I can't." His eyes didn't look at me. It was like he didn't even see me. Like I was a ghost that was invisible to the world.

"Grissom…"

He left, without another word, and another glance.

No matter how hard I tried or how many times, he always had an excuse. In fact, the last time I remember us truly talking is the day I told him the story about Scott. The bastard I almost married. Just the thought made me want to puke. I tried to keep others from feeling the pain I have, and it turns out I would have been making a bigger mistake. Just my luck.

I went to Nick's car and drove around aimlessly. I didn't know where I was going, but the time alone gave me time to think. As long as I was there to pick Nick up, he said I could use his car, so I had a while to be lost in thought.

In the last couple of weeks, I had done everything for him. Coffee, Paperwork, Dinner. I was like his slave. Working for him until I could tell him that I love him still. Doing even the simplest tasks for him just so that he might at least be able to say, that I was there for him. He didn't even have to ask. I just did. Just like a good slave. To love someone, and not be loved back. To not even be acknowledged.

I really only wanted to let him know I love him. To make sure that my final message reached him. To show him that as long as you can die with someone you love by your side, the world can be a beautiful thing. To ensure that he knows that I love him more than anything. I would do anything. The next few days past as it had before. Every time I tried to tell him, he would leave. I tried time and time again. And I would keep trying until the end. I had nothing to lose.

I just didn't think that the timing could be so perfect. I had hoped that a miracle would let me get through to him. And a miracle I was given.

A/N Alright, let's see if I can make a worthy moment. If there's any volunteers for a short time beta that can give me some advice, I'll take you up. I want to make it truely amazing. As always, leave a review!


	20. Chapter 19

I was treating Brass to dinner. He claimed I still owed him for not inviting me to my not-wedding. So, just to get rid of the guilt, I was still treating him. I don't know if he thought I was made of cash or something, but truth was, I was safe for a while. Seeing that I had free room and board at Nicky's for a while, I was okay. Good thing I was a saver.

"So, Sara."

"So…"

"Are you thinking about coming back?"

"Back…"

"Back to work. The lab is a little short handed, seeing Gil never replaced you."

"I guess…I've thought about it." Not really.

"And…"

"I…" I never did finish my sentence. The waiter came and after paying, the subject dropped.

Once in Brass's car and on our way to Nick's I found a solace in the police scanner that was going off. Like an old habit. After I left Vegas, I haven't heard one since, and it was finding comfort in the past. Sort of like a child's blanket.

I wasn't really listening to the words. Sure I caught a few here and there, but the noise was soon drowned by the ringing of Jim's phone.

"Brass."

"What?"

"Is he alright?"

"Sure, I'll pick him up."

"I'll be there in about 10 minutes."

His cell phone clicked off, and my curiosity won over.

"Where are we going?"

"Grissom collapsed at a scene."

"And…" There had to be more to the story if we had to pick him up.

"He thinks he's at the lab."

Shit. Now I was worried.

"What's wrong with him?"

"That's what we're doing. We get to take him to Doc."

At least someone's seeing him.

A fast car ride and a loopy Grissom later, we were at the morgue. I know, not the best place to get diagnosed, but officially, Doc could write prescriptions. And this way was much faster.

"He's got a very high fever."

"That's it?"

"Yup, a few days in bed and he'll be good as new."

"Then, why is he…"

"Disoriented? Probably because of the fatigue. He'll be fine I promise. Though someone should stay with him"

After making sure he was alright, I started laughing. This was a small miracle in its own.

"What are you laughing at?" Brass gave me a funny look.

"The Great Gil Grissom, who NEVER gets sick, is sick." I distinctly remember a conversation about how he never gets sick enough to have to stay home. This memory was in happier times but the thought of him having to be in bed for at least two days just seemed…hilarious.

"Alright, I'll stay with him." I offered. Seeing that he couldn't escape me when he wasn't supposed to move, I would get my chance to tell him. Of course, I would have to wait until he was…sane.

The first day was boring. Grissom slept for nearly the entire day, only waking to eat and use the bathroom. Whenever he woke up, after accomplishing one of his two small tasks, he would drop back on the bed and it was like he never even woke in the first place. I spent a lot of my time reading one of his many books beside him. Every now and then, Grissom would utter a word or so in his sleep, and every time, I would listen, trying to catch what he was dreaming.

At one point, sometime in the middle of Hamlet, I heard my name. I looked up only to find a sleeping figure, but it…soothed me. Knowing he was thinking about me. Then again, I couldn't tell if he was having a nightmare or not, but still, he was thinking about me.

After watching Grissom sleep away an entire day, I didn't have much hope for day two. But I got lucky, there were a few moments when he was perfectly…awake that morning. It was then I decided that today was the day. But, after falling back asleep directly after breakfast, I decided that when I did tell him, he had to be awake through the entire confession.

It was a funny feeling, Grissom decided. It was as if clouds had taken over and was…clouding everything. His mind, his vision, his memory. Just like the sky, there were times when the clouds disappeared and everything around him was clear, and there were times when he couldn't even tell if he was awake, and most likely, he guessed he wasn't.

And in one of his clearer moments, he was able to recognize his home, and his bed. He knew there was someone with him, and that someone was caring for him. But as quickly as it came, it ended, and soon everything was unclear and sort of spinning. He was pulled back to sleep. And the whole situation was driving him insane.

Grissom was swimming in a nightmare. There she stood, beautiful as ever, but out of reach. He was running, trying to reach her, but for every step he took, she took two back. "Sara." He cried, trying to get her to stop moving. And the more he ran to her, the smaller she got, until she was gone from his reach entirely. Blackness engulfed him, and through the twirling of the black, he could make out faint words.

"I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living,

My love you'll be."

It was her voice. There, but out of reach. His whole life story. Love. It was a dream, not a nightmare, Grissom decided. She said love. It was a dream. A good dream.

* * *

When Grissom woke and was able to recognize me as Sara, and that he was in his home because he was sick that afternoon, I decided that he was planting his ass on the bed and was going to listen to what I said.

"Grissom, there's something we need to talk about."

"As you wish." But fate be cursed, his phone rang. I was going to strangle Brass. He had to call at this moment to check up. He was the only one who knew Grissom was here with me.

"Gris…som."

"Yes."

"Yes."

"No."

"It does?"

"Yah, just fine."

"I…alright."

Damn, one sided phone calls.

"What does Brass want?"

"I…need to go a scene. Sorry Sara, this will have to wait."

"Wait…you're still sick, you can't drive." He was already dressed and out the door. I followed him, trying to at least get to the car so I could drive him and we could talk, but the car was gone and thus, so was he.

* * *

It was like walking in a dream. He couldn't exactly tell what it was he was doing, but someone said that Brass would meet him at this place, at least that's what he thought they said. He hadn't a clue what kind of scene this was, so bored of waiting, he walked in.

Looking for a dead body, Grissom wasn't really paying attention to what was around him. He didn't smell anything, or see any blood. And after circling rather empty warehouse, he noticed the man standing in the corner.

"Hello Mr. Grissom. Do you know who I am?"

"No…" Grissom looked straight at him. There was something vaguely familiar about this man.

"My name is Scott Johnson."

"Scott?" His head was searching for a case with a Scott Johnson in it. He came up empty."

Scott began to walk toward him, calmly. Grissom tried to move his feet, but couldn't. It was like his feet were frozen. Scott was next to him now.

"Yes, Scott. You've never met me."

Scott's hands took hold of the gun in its holster. He slid it out, and started to walk away.

"But, we have met someone in common."

With his gun gone and in an enemy's hand, he was suddenly alert. His sense sprang to life. He noticed all the details he missed early.

"You're…Sara's…ex."

He suddenly remembered the wedding invitation at Greg's. This was the man she was supposed to marry.

"Very good. But now, I get to tell you a little something."

Grissom was only a few feet from this guy. He would punch him if he could, and he wanted to, but even with the adrenaline pumping, he knew that you should never punch the guy with the gun.

"Sara's mine. You took her away you bastard. She never loved me the way she loved you. This is your fault."

"Didn't you cheat on her?"

Aw shit, digging myself a deeper hole. Upsetting the guy with the gun is never good, Grissom instantly feared for his life after he said that.

And though fearing for one's life is sometimes a good thing, it wasn't this time. He should have feared for his face, because that's where the punch landed.

Knocked to the ground, Grissom stayed there, not going to bother getting back up. If he was going to die anyways, what was the point of standing back up?

**A/N Sorry for the delay. I was going to be mean, and make this 2 chapters, but I decided that being mean is not nice, so I combined them and made 1 big chapter! Don't forget to review. And Sara's miracle is still a bit unclear to me too...what was i thinking?**

**P.S. The song/poem thing Grissom heard is actually from a book :P Its called Love you Forever.**


	21. Chapter 20

Yes, speeding is bad. And yes, I know I was indeed about 15 mph over the speed limit. However, it was an emergency, and I'm pretty sure any logical person would agree. When I couldn't find Grissom, and the car was gone, I started up the other car and raced towards the lab, ready to maul Brass for getting him out of bed and to work of all places.

"What the hell were you thinking?" I yelled at Brass from across the hall, not waiting to get closer and have a bit more privacy.

"That I need coffee." Was his reply, mug in hand and oblivious to what I meant.

"Sending him to a scene? You know he was in no condition."

"Send who? Grissom?"

"Yes Grissom, who else? You talked to him minutes ago."

Brass looked utterly confused. His coffee mug was half way to his mouth when it stopped, and it hadn't moved thirty seconds later when he finally responded.

"Sara, I haven't talked to Grissom since Doc checked him out."

"Then where is he?"

"Shit."

They both raced to work. Calling his cell phone. No answer. Asking Ecklie if there were any untaken cases. There were none. And after having Archie track his phone, we raced to an abandoned warehouse that I didn't know existed.

Once again, speeding is bad. However, when you have a cop behind you going the same speed if not trying to go faster, it's probably okay.

The warehouse was nothing that drew attention. It was plain, old, and obviously in need of some repair. In fact the only thing that told us that we were in the right spot was Gil's car out in front.

Moving swiftly and stealthily to the door, Brass, the few reinforcements we managed to wrangle up in the short amount of time, and I, silently walked to the entrance. I could hear voices, faintly. Just enough to where I could distinguish the…people, sounded like Gil and another man, but not hear words. The second voice seemed vaguely familiar.

Brass told everyone to hold their position and wait. Like hell I was going to wait.

"Sara." He whispered, stopping my heart for a moment, while I waited to see if they heard.

I motioned him to stay there, and to my utter bewilderment he did. First time for everything.

Grissom and the mystery man were concentrated on each other, and by sticking to the shadows, and the corners, I successfully made my way to the corner nearest them. I was… give or take, 20 feet from them, and in mystery man's blind spot. If Gil would have looked up, he would have seen me. It was probably a good thing he didn't because now wasn't the best time to test his acting abilities.

"Mr. Grissom, I blame you."

For the first time I got a good look at this guy, well as good as you can get from the back of his head. It was Scott, my ex that I didn't love. And for some reason, I wasn't surprised.

"For what?" Gil sounded miserable. I slowly crept around to Scott's side, now noticing a gun pointed at Gil. Why I didn't notice it earlier, who knows? Maybe my senses are dulling.

"You stole her heart, and she was mine. She would have still married me if she didn't love you."

"If you think so. She doesn't love me. She just wants to be friends."

It took everything I had not to gasp, cry, run and hit Gil across the head, tackle Scott, or any combination of the four.

"You're wrong." Scott said, drawing the gun and pointing it at Gil's head. Adrenaline kicked in, and before I knew what I was doing, what had happened, or what the hell was going on, a searing pain came to my body. Where, I could not exactly tell, but even with the fire burning my body, I could see Grissom screaming "Sara" and hovering over my body, Brass rushing in at the sound of gunfire, and Scott going down by a bullet coming from who knows where. But now, it was just him and me, me and him.

"It's me. It has to be me. I protect you. I tried to tell you." The words came out as fast as I could get them to and be coherent at the same time. I could feel myself zoning out. I had to get the message across, and fast. "I…love…you."

"Sara, don't talk. It'll be alright." He was holding me. It felt right. It felt right to be in his arms.

"I'll love…you…forever.

I'll…like…you…for..al…ways."

I couldn't finish, so I just shut up and closed my eyes. The pain was lessening. It felt better. Black covered the light like a blanket. I couldn't see, but it was alright. He said it would be alright.

"As long as I'm living,

My Sara you'll be."

He finished the song. I could have sworn I heard him finish the song. Wait, he changed to song. Yes, I'm almost positive he changed it. But you never know, because after you sight goes, your hearing does. And that's just about the last thing I heard.

**A/N Try as I might, I couldn't get the chapter jsut right, so I posted it not wanting to keep all you lovely readers waiting. So I apologize. Also, I thnk there's at leaast one more chapter left.**


	22. Chapter 21

Yet again. Again I was here at a god damn hospital on the brink of death. Okay, maybe death was an exaggeration, but by the way my wound burned, it felt like I was going to die.

I didn't even have to open my eyes to know I was in a hospital. In fact, I didn't open my eyes, I couldn't. I could smell the whiteness. Whatever the hell it was they had me hooked up to, it made my sleepy. And if it was pain killers, I can tell the world right now, they weren't working. But if they were sleeping pills, then yes, they were working. Because I was sleepy, very sleepy.

* * *

The mind is a very funny thing. I was still in a dream mode. Kind of like just waking up, the only difference was, I was more asleep than awake. I could remember a gunshot, then pain, then a hospital. Other than that, the details were fuzzy at best. I clung on to the little memories I still had, afraid that the next time I woke up, they would be gone. The fire that once coursed through my body was now dulled. Maybe the painkillers were finally kicking in. Funny though, I could no longer smell the hospital.

* * *

The next time I woke up, I was awake. I was able to open my eyes and see for the first time, where the hell I was, and to be honest, I wasn't quite sure where that was. I jolted up, ignoring the throbbing, in what I now was able to pinpoint as, my arm. My head turned frantically, taking in a bulk of the details. I was on a decently sized bed in a room that was fully furnished. My first thoughts were _Where the hell am I _and _Why am I alone_ in that order.

Now think of it from my point of view. I had been asleep for who knows how long. My only memories for how I got into the condition I was presently in (bullet in my arm), was leaping in front of the bullet's path and taking the hit for Grissom and then possibly being in the hospital afterwards. And now I was in a mysterious room, by myself. So after my first thoughts passed, my next question was _Where the hell is Grissom?_ For saving the man's life, you'd think he'd at least stick around to see if I woke up. Then again, _I guess he didn't love me after all_. Which by the way was my next thought.

Staying in my sitting position, I swept the room for smaller details. My panic as well as hope gone. My last ditch effort to show Gil I loved him had failed. In my slower glance around the room I saw a plate of food. Nothing rich or complicated, just bread and fruit. It made me smile. Someone here at least cared about me. Enough to make me food when I might not even wake. It was then I realized I was changed. Well, I had to be, it's not like I would still be in bloody clothes, but I was in my clothes. My clothes that were at Nick's. The thought of him changing me into fresh clothes not only made me blush, but was just embarrassing. But I wasn't at Nick's. No, this was someplace new…ish.

My head turned automatically at the sound of a page turning. It was coming from the opened door. I got up and stumbled a bit…a lot towards the door. When I got there I hung onto the frame as if it were my life support. Slowly, I began making my way down the now familiar hall. Both my hands stretched out sideways to support myself against the walls on my sides. When I finally reached the end of the short, but too long hallway, I couldn't help but smile. Because there, sitting in a recliner chair, was the love of my life reading a book.

It was a wonder how he hadn't heard me knock almost everything I passed over. Then again, he was always a deep thinker.

**A/N It's not over, but the rollercoaster is coming to an end. Lemme know what you guys think of this chapter by reviewing :P Thanks.**


	23. Chapter 22

It was scary. To be more accurately, it was probably most horrifying experience in his whole life.

Grissom stared at the page his book was opened to, not reading a word of the story. He didn't have to. He knew the story front and back, the book was merely a prop to give him something to hold on to. He had already made breakfast for Sara, just like he had the last few days, in case she woke up. He had nothing better to do than think about that day.

* * *

FLASHBACK GRISSOM's POV

I was talking to this man, Sara's ex-fiancé. He blamed me for taking Sara away from him. He had my gun. He had my gun pointed straight at my head. He was going to shoot me. And I remember not caring. What did I have left to live for anyways? I was convinced that I had lost what mattered most. But when he pulled the trigger, she blocked it. She jumped in front of the bullet's path to save me.

"_Sara." I didn't scream, I was too shocked to scream. Brass rushed in when he heard the sound of the gun going off. He and some men behind him had their guns aimed at Scott. _

_I grabbed Sara's gun and shot, taking Scott down. I hit him in the leg, screaming Sara's name as a way of revenge._

_"It's me. It has to be me. I protect you. I tried to tell you." She was talking. _

"_Don't talk." I told her. Did she listen? No. Did she even hear me? I'm not too sure. Damn women were so difficult._

"_I…love…you." _

_WHAT? She loves me? And all this time…_

"_I'll love…you…forever, _

_I'll…like…you…for…al…ways."_

_It wasn't a dream. It was real_

_She stopped talking, leaving her song unfinished. I knew she could hear me. My heart told me so._

"_As long as I'm living, _

_My Sara you'll be."_

_I finished the song, hoping that she could hear me and realized that I love her too._

The next few days she spent at the hospital. After they got the bullet out of her arm, and considered her in a stable condition, they announced that she could be released as long as someone took care and looked after her. This caused arguments. Nick wanted to take her because he was the one she was living with. Jim wanted her because she was more of a daughter to him than his actual daughter. Catherine claimed that her being a woman, she would be able to take care of her best. Greg just wanted her so he could claim to have spent the night with her, but he didn't say that. He said that he was her favorite. Warrick fought with the "I live the closest to everyone else, therefore I keep her and you guys visit." Of course I fought, saying that I lived with her for years and knew what she liked best. And as I predicted nobody heard me.

In the end, Warrick won the fight and everyone was given access to his house. Sara took residence in his guest bedroom, and I took residence on his couch. I tapped into my enormous vacation time and took the role of "Sara sitter while all you guys are working." In reality, I just wanted to be close to her.

Lost in my thoughts of how I was going to make it up to her when she woke, I looked up to see that hours had passed since I sat down. I looked towards the hall, a routine I established since I've been at Warrick's. Look down the hall and think about how sorry I am. Only this time, when I looked, something blocked the hallway entrance. Something tall, skinny, and standing…STANDING? This standing figure was Sara, and there was no way she should be standing. Actually, she wasn't even supposed to be moving, let alone walking all the way down the hall to stand against the wall. But she was smiling. A smile I hadn't seen for years. And it made everything that much better.

A/N Thought I'd give Grissom's story so I could fill in any blanks you guys may have. I'm debating how long it takes to recover from a bullet in the arm condition... Hmmmm...Don't forget to review:P


	24. Chapter 23

I had wobbled all the way over here, so I decided I was going to stay and lean against the sturdy wall.

"Sara."

A one word sentence that said everything.

"Grissom, Where…Thanks for breakfast." I was going to say 'Where are we?', but changed my mind, and decided to comment on the food I hadn't touched.

He got up and came to me. So close, he was standing so close to me, that if I could do it and not potentially injure us both, I would close the gap and kiss him. Instead, I got a bigger surprise when he lifted me up and carried me to the couch. Thank goodness too, because or else I would have been standing there forever.

"Sara, I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For…" He trailed off.

"It's fine."

"Oh, well then there's something I need to make clear."

I said nothing. There really was nothing to say.

"Sara, I love you, I've loved you forever. No matter what happens…"

I cut him off because I really didn't need to hear more. Now that I was safely on the couch and in no danger of falling, I leaned in and kissed him. No tongue, no groping, just a simple kiss that spoke volumes. I would have gone farther, if it wasn't for the sound of the door opening and a loud entrance by everyone. It was then, to my disappointment, that we we're interrupted.

"I see someone made up." Greg announced, smiling and energetic as always.

"Hey yah, you guys, no sex in the house." Warrick said, smiling, but I'm pretty sure he was serious.

"Alright, alright," Grissom moved the topic off us, "what's to eat?"

"Nick's day to buy," Catherine announced happily.

"I thought it was…" Grissom was interrupted again.

"It was, but Nick lost out bet, so he buys." That explained Catherine's smile.

"I was hoping you would forget." Nick grumbled as he grabbed Greg and started to the car.

"Not a chance Nick." Catherine was still gloating, while Greg was asking, "Why do I have to go?"

"Because you're the pickiest and I don't want to hear how I got the wrong thing." Nick was still downcast.

"So, I see somebody's finally awake." Warrick said, sitting down next to me.

"Yup, and after sleeping for who knows how long, I'm still tired."

"Go ahead and take a nap, we'll wake you when food is here." Warrick said, throwing me a blanket.

"Thanks." I wasn't hungry, but time with everyone seemed like a good idea. I laid down and fell back asleep, only to wake up in a rage.

A/N I know I know, it's short. I'm sorry. Leave a review please, and I'll see you all in a week. It's vacation time.


	25. Chapter 24

Lesson number one with women were that they were always right. Lesson number two was that if they were asleep don't do something retarded. Every man should know that. Obviously, Greg didn't.

"That was expensive as hell Greg!"

"How was I supposed to know that you, the woman who hardly wears make up, had expensive make up?"

Greg had taken it upon himself to draw a mustache on my face with eye liner that cost me more than he was worth. He earned himself a slap across the face for that.

"Couldn't you read the brand?"

"If I hadn't told you how much my coffee cost, would you know?" Greg countered.

He had a good point, but one good point wasn't going to get me to drop the subject. A yank from Grissom to the kitchen where he wiped off the eyeliner did though. The food was here, and although Nick and Warrick were enjoying the show, Catherine wanted to eat, and made that point very clear.

Everyone crowded around Warrick's small table, Greg seated safely across from me, a red mark blazing on his cheek.

"So what do you want to do now?" Nick asked, trying to stop the silence.

I must have given him a confused look, because he explained further.

"Now that you're awake, and somewhat mobile, you can stay here, come back to my place, stay with Brass, Catherine, or Grissom…"

"Hey how come my name wasn't in there?" Greg interrupted, completely forgetting the fight we had had only moments ago.

"Because if she stayed with you, you would harass her and she would kill you. So what's your plan?" Nick answered Greg and finished his sentence at the same time.

I glanced at Grissom who stared at me. "I'm not sure…I'll have to think about it."

I wasn't too sure, if moving in with Grissom was alright or not.

"But, can I stay here until I can at least walk by myself?"

"Sure." Warrick said, pausing from his meal. "But, can we at least eat out once in a while Sara? We've crammed into this table for a while and my arms can't take much more of this." He waved his hand, indicating the fact that Greg and Catherine were pressed together and he was in the middle of the sandwich.

"Sure. But I don't want any BBQ crap."

"Crap? How can you say that about good old meat?" Nick looked horrified at the thought of meat being crap.

"It's all right Nick, it can't be too hard to go without meat. What did you do while Sara was staying with you?" Catherine spoke up from her food for the first time.

"Sneak it in." Nick mumbled under his breath, just loud enough for me to catch it.

"What?" I feigned shock.

It was like old times again. Everyone together, laughing and talking. Just being a family. Just like it was all those years ago. It was like a circle. My life started rough, turned good, and repeated nearly twice. I was just glad that the circle landed on the good half.

A/N Short, yes. Over, no. I just need some ideas...


	26. Chapter 25

After everyone but Warrick, who lived here, and Grissom, who was still "Sara Sitting, left, the house turned quiet. It wasn't a nice sort of silence, but the kind of awkward, what do I say/do now, kind of silent. Warrick, being the smart one, left to take a shower, leaving both the silence and awkwardness behind. That left only me and Grissom, Grissom and me.

"Sara?"

"Yeah." I noticed that we were sitting in completely separate chairs and talking in one word sentences. Not exactly the conversation I expected to have after earlier today.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

This was as much privacy we were going to get, so now is probably a good time.

"Why didn't you say you were going to stay with me?"

"Huh?" His question hadn't fully registered in my head.

"You said you weren't sure what you were going to do. How come you didn't say you were going to stay with me?" Grissom repeated.

"I didn't know if it was alright."

"Oh, I thought…" He didn't finish his sentence, leaving me, and my curiosity to sit there and think.

"Thought what?" I questioned after I couldn't take waiting for the answer anymore, which in turn only took about 30 seconds.

"You didn't want to stay with me." He explained as if were as clear as day.

Honestly? This man still had doubts about my love for him, after I _jumped in front of a bullet_ in order to _save his life._ If that didn't scream love, I don't know what will.

I didn't even bother to respond to him, I just walked over and kissed him, pouring as much feeling as I could into it.

"Okay, you can move in whenever you like." Grissom said smiling. Good, he finally got the point.

"Hey Grissom, if I've been in the guest room, where have you been staying in order to Sara Sit?"

"The couch. Where else?"

Yuck, the couch. I don't know about Warrick's couch, but whenever I fall asleep on mine, my back aches the next day.

"Hmm, maybe you can bunk with me."

Of course, Warrick chose this moment to walk in.

"No sex in the house and it's okay." He said, from the hallway, dead serious.

"Deal." I said, smiling wide, and laughing on the inside at his terms of agreement.

Once Warrick left, or rather, moved in front of the TV and Grissom and I left to 'our room', I continued where I left off. After another reminder of "No sex" and the shutting of doors, I pulled Griss…Gil into another kiss, going further than I had before.

Tongues dancing, Gil ruined my happy thoughts when he reminded me of the No Sex rule. As if I needed reminding. You didn't have to have sex every time we made out. So after telling Gil not to worry, and to let me enjoy the moment, everything was looking up.

Things were moving forward. A while ago, I would have thought all of this impossible. I was wrong. Things can change.

A/N Sorry for the lateness of this chapter. I still don't know how i want to end this...in other words where i want this to go. Yes, good things are about to come. Reviews are nice. Sorry for the lateness. perfectwolf :)


	27. Chapter 26

It took only a week so or before I was able to do things and not feel a pain in my arm. It was 2 weeks until I actually got to move in with Gil. The extra week was so that he could "make the house livable again." In other words so he could clean, stock the fridge and find a good hiding spot for his roaches. He learned when I first moved in with him, well the first time anyways that the roaches were a no.

The faithful day was here and after a thank you and goodbye to Warrick, I left off to Gil's…my…our home. The car ride was only 10 minutes, tops, but today it seemed to last hours. I couldn't wait to get there, or rather, until the no sex rule stopped applying. I stared out the window, watching all the familiar places fly by, and though it didn't make time fly any faster like I hoped it would, it did make things a little better.

Once Gil pulled into the driveway and we had both gotten out of the car, it didn't take me long to pull him into the house and kiss him. I hadn't had sex in a few years, and that only spurred me on more. My need for him was more than I can bear, and with my great skill I undressed him as I steered us through the oh so familiar house.

When we finally found the bed, I realized that somehow on our way here, I had lost my clothing as well. In my moment of thought I had been positioned under him. Kissing me again, he pushed himself into me, bringing me a feeling I had missed in the last 4ish years. I'd like to say I remembered what happened, but in all honesty, I was so wrapped up in the fact that we were even having sex to notice anything other than the fact that it was mind blowing and it was about time. After outlasting me, and the finishing himself, he lay next to me, mindful of my arm, and in all honesty I was glad. I wrapped myself into him and lay there in the moment. Thinking happy thoughts about how things are finally coming back together.

"Why did you do it?"

Well, there went my train of happy thoughts.

"Do what?"

"Stop the bullet."

Wow, such a depressing topic. Why the hell would he want to talk about that, _right after we had sex? _Wasn't it obvious enough? I LOVE HIM!

"Why?"

"I was just wondering. I mean, it's not like I was being nice to you. I know you love me, and that that's going to be your answer, but why didn't you…I mean you could have been…"

"Killed? Because, it was worth the risks."

"But if you would have died…"

"Exactly. You would have died if I hadn't done what I did, and in all honesty I didn't think, I just wanted you to see that I really did love you, even if it cost me…"

"Your life." He finished for me. Wow, we were good at finishing each other's sentences.

"Yes."

"You can't do that."

"Huh?" Was my intelligent answer.

"If you were to die, I…wouldn't know what to do with myself."

"Same here. I love you Gil. I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always…"

"As long as I'm living, my Sara you'll be." He finished the song before I could, but I finished my part as well anyways.

"As long as I'm living, forever yours I'll be."

I'm very very very very sorry for the delay. School is demanding. I want to thank all you readers that have taken the time to read my story, even when I wasn't thinking of finishing. I do believe this is the end, but who knows, maybe I'll write a mini epilouge thing. Thanks again. And leave reviews as always please,

perfectwolf


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